Valentine's Day dengan Hari Kekasih. ada beza ka? cuba direct translate dua ayat tu, reflect sepenuhnya ka? x kan... kita x panggil Hari St. Valentine kan?

aku membanding dua pemahaman di mana,
satu dengan hujahnya Valentine's Day ni haram disambut.
satu dengan x berhujah, dan sambut Hari Kekasih.

Jika dibaca asal-usul Valentine's Day ni, mmg merujuk kepada St.Valentine yg mati dibunuh Claudius II raja Rom.. so, kalau mengikut pemahaman yg pertama, kira haram la sambut ulangtahun kematian seorang paderi...

pemahaman kedua plk malas mo berhujah.

Bagi aku, ini benda yg dari penerimaan masing2 .... ada yg sambut bagi memperingati kekasih masing2.. ada yg saja ikut trend semasa... dorang bukan sambut ulangtahun kematian dia... silap2, xtau pun Valentine tu sapa... dalam kepala hanya gambaran budak kecik bogel pegang bow n arrow love..

dari satu sudut, Valentine dibunuh sebab raja Rom tu ajak dia convert pegi paganisme, tapi xmo, so kena hukum bunuh. dari satu sudut plk, Valentine dibunuh sebab dia mengahwinkan askar lelaki secara diam2..sebab time tu Raja Rom berpendapat, askar2 lebih baik x pyh berkahwin agar komitmen lebih tertumpu kepada kuasa militan. so, perjuangan Valentine untuk memperjuangkan cinta, dikenang dan disambut oleh orang lain...

Read More

Engkau perempuan kejam...

hopefully, golongan perempuan sebegini hanyalah segelintir kecil dalam masyarakat...kejam gila. Aku yg keras hati ni pun tidak sekejam ini...*#@$@*%$#

Gambar2 seterusnya menunjukkan seberapa kejam seorang perempuan yang asalnya mempunyai sifat lemah lembut.....berfikir la dua kali sebelum melihat.hehe.karang muka korang pulak aku letak,mana la tau kan.....

Read More

Relax! It's just a date.


You finally met someone who seems great. You may have had a few conversations on the phone and now you are both ready to spend time together. The good news is that your first date will help determine how much of a connection you really have. The bad news is that there is typically a lot of anxiety around this first meeting.

It doesn’t have to be bad at all. Daters build up their expectations and put so much pressure themselves that the date can be doomed before they even get out of the house. Before this happens, you have to remember the objective of why you are meeting in the first place.

You are meeting this person to learn more about them. You like this person and you are going to get to do the one thing that you want -– spend time with them! You are going to do something fun with this person to really see if they are as great as you thought they were. You are getting the chance to learn some key things about your date while they are learning more about you too. You can do all of this while having a good time doing something fun.

No need to fear

You got this far in the process because this person is interested in you. Your date is already attracted to you in some way so you don’t have to be perfect to get to know them more. Be yourself. More than likely, all of the things you find so quirky about yourself, the other person may find unique and special. This is not the time to change it up. Just show up and expect to have fun.

Setting up for success

Before you meet, you can plan to have a good experience. Pay attention to the conversations that you have before your date. What are his/her interests? What kinds of activities does he/she consider fun? What really makes him/her feel comfortable and let their hair down? Your date has a great chance of being successful if you take these factors into account.

Jointly decide on the activity. Pick something that you will both enjoy. For example, if you both like music, but have varying tastes, pick an outdoor concert that has a variety of artists.

Select a first date that allows you to have the opportunity to chat and interact. Even if you decide to go to a movie, plan to get coffee or a snack afterwards. This will give you an opportunity to share opinions but also to learn more about one another.

Something to talk about


Now that you are together, what should you talk about? There are number of things to chat about that will help determine if you have things in common. Here are some items that you may want to discuss:

*Favorite hobbies
*Favorite movies/TV shows
*Places you enjoy going
*Things you like to do in your spare time
*Places of interest you have traveled to

Avoid discussing:

*Your ex
*Your baby’s momma/daddy
*Bad relationship tales
*Your mother
*Emotional issues you are trying to overcome

As you get to know your date, you of course want to know where they stand on certain issues. However, the goal on your first date is to keep it light. The key is touch on safe topics that allow your date to get to know you more without going into the deep, nitty-gritty. Also, stay away from explosive topics which usually come from politics, religion and sex. You don’t want to get into a heated a debate over appetizers.

Enjoy the experience


When you are on the date, your focus should be on enjoying it. Feel good about doing something fun with someone who wants to get to know you better. Too often, daters are so caught up in their presentation -- what the other person is thinking of them, whether or not their date finds them irritable -- that they forget to have fun. Be interesting and interested. Dates are better when both parties are engaged and into one another. Every first date is not going to end up with a fairy tale wedding, so enjoying the moment counts. Immediate chemistry may or may not happen and sometimes relationships grow out of friendships too. Enjoying the date leaves the door open for friendship, love interest or a new acquaintance who can lead you to someone else!

Wrapping it up


The end of a date can cause just as much anxiety as the beginning. The age old question forms: should there be a good night kiss at the end of the date? The true answer is it just depends. If you had good chemistry and felt a connection, a good night kiss may be the way to go. If the date was pleasant but you are not ready to take it to the next level, a good night hug may be in order. The level of touching really depends on how close or distant you feel and how you perceive the other person to feel. Keeping it friendly takes the pressure off: a quick embrace saying you had a nice time might be just enough.

What’s next?

More than likely, your date is looking for clues to determine whether or not there will be another meeting. If you are interested, it is ok to say you had a great time and would like to see them again. If that feels like too much pressure, make it clear that you enjoyed his/her company and you would like to keep in touch as you can call them later. If you position the conversation to show your interest, your follow-up should be easier. It also makes it easy for your date to express his/her feelings too.

First dates should be fun and memorable. Take these tips into account to take the pressure off of your next first encounter.

Read More

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty,
he said..."no..."

She asked him if he would
want to be with her forever....
and he said "no...."

She then asked him
if she were to leave
would he cry?
and once again he replied with a no

She had heard enough

As she walked away, tears streaming down her face
the boy grabbed her arm and said
"you're not pretty you're beautiful"
"I dont want to be with you forever i NEED to be with you forever"
" And I wouldnt cry if you walked away...
I'd die..."

Read More

IMPROVE YOUR CONFIDENCE


Ultimately our fear is of the consequences of showing our emotions - how will people react? Some men can feel under the additional burden of believing that displaying their emotions will make them appear less masculine. They can feel emotionally trapped by traditional 'macho images'. These images seem to dictate that some emotions are 'feminine' such as fear, anxiety and sadness - and that these can only be shown in restricted measures.
If showing our emotions leaves us feeling exposed and vulnerable, then why do it? There are two main incentives to do so; the first is the effect on us and the second is the effect on our personal lives.
Releasing our emotions can act as a safety valve - relieving inner tensions, like steam out of a kettle. It relieves the pressure of holding them in or disguising them. Guarded emotions in a relationship can lead to misunderstandings about how you're really feeling. Lack of visible emotions can be taken as a lack of feeling.
This situation can certainly hinder a successful relationship. What can be done? For people in real difficulty there are steps they can take to help themselves.


Step 1 - clarify the problem
Your difficulty showing your emotions may not affect you all the time. On close reflection, you may find it's primarily triggered in certain situations or environments, or when you're with certain people. If this is the case, then this is the area you should be focusing on. Clarifying this can also help with the next step.


Step 2 - understand how your problems started
You may not always have been this way, and your problem could have begun with a key incident in your past. Bad experiences can lead to the development of fearful beliefs about the future - fears the past will be repeated if we act the same way again.
It's these fears that hold back our emotions. For example, a man who is ridiculed by a friend for crying may feel he couldn't possibly cry in front of that friend again, for fear of receiving the same criticism again. This, in itself, is quite understandable and not an unreasonable response. The difficulty is that our defence mechanisms tend to go further than necessary and become generalised. So this same man might feel he couldn't display any real emotions to any male friends - or possibly to anybody at all. If you can identify a key trigger in your past, then your actions can be rationalised and challenged more easily.


Step 3 - set goals
Your goals for change need to be realistic. People are all different and some are more naturally demonstrative than others. There's no absolute right or wrong way. There's no point trying to be a Mediterranean type when you're more of a Scandinavian in nature. Aim for something that feels comfortable for you. Remember it's not always appropriate to give full reign to your emotions so again aim for something you can live with.


Step 4 - get started
Don't expect to change overnight. Changing ingrained ways of behaving can take time; go slowly and pace yourself. Make yourself feel as secure as possible when you begin. For example, don't start off by trying to show emotion at work - choose an environment when you feel safe with people you trust. Gently allow yourself to test out your emotions.
Challenge your beliefs about the bad things that might happen if you show your emotions. Start by arguing with yourself about what you think might happen - ask yourself if it's really true, whether it could really happen, and whether there are any other possible outcomes.
When you feel ready, test out changing your behaviour and see what really happens. Analyse this honestly and be guided by it. With time, move yourself on, test yourself more and more. This will lessen your fears and help you make progress.


Step 5 - accept your limitations
Be realistic and accept that in some cases you may never be as free with your emotions as you would like to be, but change at least brings you closer to your goals. Also remember that not showing emotions doesn't mean you don't have them. There are other ways to communicate how you feel to the people around you. For example, what you do, what you say and your body language, are all good ways to get feelings across without having to spell out your emotions. If you're limited in one area, then rely more on others.

Read More